A Question of Cannibalism
木曜日, 3月 31, 2005

Public Nuisance

I love spring holidays. The cherry blossoms are blooming, the skies are sunny, the pollen count is low and I can sleep in every day.

Oh wait, no, that's all a complete lie. Due to crazy weather patterns, it is cold, raining, the blossoms are still hiding in their mother tree's tree womb, people everywhere are exploding from hayfever and i can't sleep in because EVERY MORNING I GET WOKEN UP BY POLITICIANS.

If you wanted to get votes, would you drive around early in the morning screaming from a loudspeaker? I sure wouldn't. In fact (although it is a moot point because I can't vote here), if I could I would vote for the guy who makes it his main platform not to annoy the citizens.

HELLO! I'M NANTOKA RANTOKA! I WILL FIGHT TO THE END! THANKS FOR YOUR SUPPORT! I VERY POLITELY AM EXISTING! THANKYOU!

Um. You are a noisy fuck. Very politely cease to exist.

It's even worse when you're riding down the street on your bike and one of the campaign cars is driving along behind you (slowly of course, so as to maximise annoyance). It's like being tailed by a police helicopter. I was so afraid I swallowed all the acid I was carrying and so now I am likely to seven return blood poored flying falling .....

Anyway, just to prove how ubiquitous these things are... I will now go outside and take a photo of a car. I will remain outside for only 2 minutes but I guarantee to see one of these mobile fuckwagons. Back in a jiffy.



OK, more like 5 minutes, probably because I wasn't trying to sleep at the time. Thanks, Mr Komeguchi.

Still, not as bad as the roast potato man who comes past in the middle of the night playing some fucking siren. I guess the fact that such little things irritate me means my life is generally pretty tame? Perhaps.

On the other hand, Japan also has good points. Like a strange addiction to raw ham (prosciutto) and grapefruit flavouring. EVERYTHING is grapefruit flavoured: kleenex tissues, sports drinks, soap, even the grapefruits are grapefruit flavoured. I think that's all. 
Comments:
Haha that's hilarious! Mobile fuckwagons is my new favourite phrase.
 
Those sweet potato van broadcasts are spooky. I used to think it was the devil, advertising his wares.
Grapefruit, on the other hand, is the flavour of Heaven itself.
 
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For too long, puritanical love-monkeys have been talking ill of one of our little planet's most time-honoured gastronomical past-times. Have YOUR say in reclaiming your right to eat your friends. If god had meant us not to eat human flesh, why did he make it so damn tasty?

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場所: Perth, Australia
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